Ryan’s Bodacious Weekly Countdown
Top 5 Movie Babes of the 80s
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5. Amanda Peterson as Cindy Mancini – Can’t Buy Me Love : Donned in her
all white, fringe, suede jacket, Cindy made a “Man”-cini out of teen boys
across the country. Captain of the cheerleaders, She Rah-Rah’d for Ronald
Miller (after he paid her) and took him from “geek to chic,” due to her
popularity and straight up hotness. To this day, I still wish I could have
seen her do the African Anteater Ritual Dance. I recently tried to get an
interview with her and her current relationships, but she was very
tight-lipped. I guess I could have seen that coming — after all, take a look
at her forehead ... “do you see a sign that says information?” |
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4. Christie Brinkley as the “Girl in the Ferrari” – National Lampoon’s
Vacation: Too hot to be given a name, “The girl in the Ferrari” sped
onto the big screen in National Lampoon’s Vacation. She joined Clark W.
Griswold in a late night, motel skinny dipping soiree and captured him in
her sexy spell long enough for him to dance erotically with a dog-urine
soaked sandwich. Now, rapidly approaching 60 years of age, to the dismay
of her long time fan base, she has transformed from Christie Brinkley, to
Christie Wrinkly. |
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3.
Jessica Tandy as Daisy Wertham – Driving Miss Daisy: Hey, DON’T
JUDGE ME! okay...fine—moving on.... |
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3. Kelly Lynch as Doctor Elizabeth Kay – Road House: This small town
doctor got her MD-elicious from SMU (Smokin’ Hot University). Armed with
beauty and brains, Doc mended Dalton’s injuries (because “Pain don’t
hurt”) and stroked his ego and his mullet, up in the barn loft. She wisely
passed up the role in the sequel, Roadhouse 2 — Last Call. It ended up
being a real stinker. Like a “Double Deuce” stinker. |
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2. Kelly LeBrock as Lisa – Weird Science: Created by two dweebs using a
Barbie and bras on their heads, Lisa comes out of virtuality and into
reality, via a bolt of lightning, and many Playboy magazine cut outs.
Sporting quite possibly the biggest hair of any 80s movie, Lisa
personifies the male fantasy. The ability to create the perfect woman — and
one that “aerobicizes” and hops in the shower with you at any moment. She
goes even further to solidify her babe-itude by helping Gary and Wyatt
score dates with their long time crushes by throwing a party with “chips,
dips, chains and whips.” At the conclusion of the film, Lisa becomes the
high school gym teacher — and inevitably establishes climbing the rope as
the most enjoyable part of class. |
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1.
Phoebe Cates as Linda Barrett – Fast Times at Ridgemont High: Note to
the movie-makers of today: Slow motion hot girl + running in a bikini =
box office gold! One of the most memorable scenes from the incredibly
memorable movie, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Cates wore out the pause
buttons on VCRs and Beta machines everywhere, as she emerged out of the
swimming pool and into Judge Reinhold’s fantasy world. In real life, she
ended up marrying actor Kevin Kline, forever shattering my comedic dream
of having her marry NFL Wide Receiver, Don Beebe ... think about
it ... think about it.... |
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