Ryan’s Bodacious Weekly Countdown
Top 5 Cartoons of the 80s
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5. He-Man: Masters of the Universe – He-Man was THE Man (say “THE”
with the long “e” . . . sounds way cooler). He had the power of
Grayskull and used his HE-roics to take on Skeletor and his evil empire.
When he wasn’t roided up, he was just Adam--boring old Adam. At least
Adam wore pants, and not a He-Mana Hammock, but I digress. He also had a
twin sister named She-Ra, who was Adora when she wasn’t She-Ra. The
cartoon taught a valuable lesson to all kids--when you just settle for
who you are, you are underappreciated and ignored. But, shed some
clothes, show some skin, and grab a sword, and you’ll have all the
popularity you can handle. |
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4. Inspector Gadget – Gadget Copter! Gadget Springs! Gadget
Rules!!!! Go Go Gadget Arms! The Inspector was as inept as they
come, but with the help of Penny and Brain, he was always able
to thwart Dr. Claw and his evil plans. Claw conducted his M.A.D.
baddy business from behind his super computer, always stroking
his evil feline friend, creatively called “M.A.D. Cat.” Gadget,
like so many other 80s cartoons, was made into a live action
film in recent years, starring Matthew Broderick. In a related
story, Sarah Jessica Parker is currently being investigated for
using Broderick’s Gadget Mallet movie prop on whoever it was
that convinced her to take the role she was offered in Hocus
Pocus. |
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3.
Alvin and The Chipmunks – Alvin, Simon . . .
Theodore! The Chipmunks rocked and rolled, combining cartoon fun
with squeaky songs in almost an animated MTV sort of way.
Animated music videos would surface throughout the episodes,
mainly focusing on putting the episode’s plot alongside a
current popular hit song. Alvin was the rodent rebel, leading
the other two brothers into pickle after pickle. Speaking of
pickles, Theodore was the chunky “Munk-y,” always snacking and
putting on more pounds. Simon, the brainy one (we know he was
brainy because he had glasses, and all people that wear glasses
are extraordinarily smart) rounded out the trio. Ironically,
they eventually ran into the Chippettes: Brittany, Eleanor, and
Jeanette, who are pretty much the exact same character types as
the boys, but weren’t quite as goofy. Not quite as silly. They
didn’t have that slapstick panache. What is the phrase I am
searching for? Oh YEAH! They were the same, but without the
nuts. :) |
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2.
The Jetsons – “Eep Opp Ork Ah Ah . . . that means I love you,” and the
Jetsons! While the Jetsons made their first appearance in the earlier
60s, they are best known for their stint in the 80s (1985-1987). I think
Judy Jetson was my first “Cartoon Crush,” and pretty much the only girl
I have ever crushed on that had white hair. Well, she and Estelle Getty.
Aaaanyway, The Jetsons were the Flintstones of the future. George and
Jane, Judy and Elroy, Astro (Ruh-Roh!), and Rosie the Maid were the
Jetsons regulars. But, don’t forget Orbity, the springy-stepped alien
that bounced all over the Jetson abode. I loved the show, but couldn’t
stand Mr. Spacely. Man, that guy was a jerk. He barely came up to
George’s knees. Worse still, he was always yelling at George. If it were
me, I would have kicked him square in the Sprockets . . . no doubt.
>
Link to the Violent Femmes (a Like Totally 80s fav) cover of “Eep
Opp Ork Ah-Ah.” |
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1.
Smurfs – These lovable little blue creatures
easily conclude our countdown as the best cartoon of the 80s. There were
all sorts of Smurfs running around. Brainy and Clumsy and Grouchy. Chef
and Vanity and Scaredy Smurf. I always liked Dreamy Smurf; he was always
dreaming of things, almost in a constant state of Euphoria. Or, maybe he
was in his mushroom house too much, if you catch my drift. Though it is
said that Baby Smurf was delivered by a stork, I believe this was a
conspiracy too vivid for young audiences. I believe Smurfette got her Schmurf
on with someone. Possibly Papa Smurf. He was always such a Smurfvert. |
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