By Ryan Zimmerman
Ryan here! Back again with the Top 5 Countdown. This time it is Top 5 80s Summer Fashions. As Buster Poindexter would say, it’s “Hot, Hot, Hot!” and so are these summertime fashion trends.
Yes, I know these aren’t too summer-ish. But hey, sometimes there are cool summer nights, and if the night chill gives you the need to be ill, you can slip on the M.O. You know how you knew it was a Member’s Only jacket? Because it said so, right there on the jacket in that little rectangle. It had that weird neck button thing that I guess made it even cooler and a pocket, get this, on the inside!! The question on everyone’s mind was, exactly what were we “members” of? I’ll tell you . . . members of the OBMF club, that’s what!
Forget Dolce and Gabana. Forget Vuarnet. Forget Oakley. Forget them all, except for Wayfarers by Ray Ban. Whether it was a simple color or a black and white checkered design, you could be oh so cool at the pool by wearing these fun-in-the-sun glasses. So get a pair for a fraction of the price of those designer glasses and ask yourself, “Mirror, mirror on the wall, who has the coolest Wayfarers of all?” . . . That would be you, sexy.
Hey, did someone throw up on your shorts? No! Those are my Jams! Jams were the near equivalent of a no holds barred match of wild vs. style and let’s face it, we all won that battle! If we had to relive an 80s shorts fashion, and the choices were Jams or those teeny, tiny, plum smuggler shorts, Jams win any day! When it comes to covering up those hams, grab yourself the latest and freshest pair of Jams!
2. Painter Hats
Who is possibly cooler than a painter? Rock Stars, Movie Stars, Athletes, . . . pretty much anyone but the janitor that sprinkles that magic sawdust on throw up in school. But somehow, rather than sporting your favorite team on your lid, a white painter hat with some splatter and essential buttons was radical, boss and tubular as all get out. I never actually saw a painter wear a painter hat though. . . . I think they did at one time, but then once they saw all these teenagers wearing them, they had a national painter meeting and said, “Okay guys, let’s keep the overalls, but the hats have to go . . . they really look pretty lame.”
1. Biker Shorts
Ahhhh . . . the Jams more popular and much tighter cousin. For whatever reason and regardless if you were a bicycle enthusiast or not, biker shorts were a necessity. Self conscious of the “biker bulge” guys? Cover up the crotch with some Umbros, Union Jacks, or any other sporty soccer shorts. Let’s just say being a guy and choosing to wear them without covering them up with shorts, well, makes you a bit “nuts.”
Photo credit: Imbeccable